Feeling miserable and empty writing this post here doesn’t seem to make me feel any better. Rest??? Can rest really make one feels better and energetic in everything him/her do? Today’s already saturday and i’ve been slacking and rested for 3 days to be exact despite I was really sick since thursday.. I’ was just lazing around and not doing anything eventhough i’ve like 5 submissions next week with one vital submission which is the draft proposal which was requested by Mr Ting..
I was feeling so stupid and feeling like an idiot when I met him last thursday… the things that he told me and the things that I thought i knew about my title were so different that my heart began to sink deeply…. just wanted to break down and cry at the moment, telling him that i really dont know how and what to do.. but i know its hopeless and useless to do that.. so i just kept quiet, dragged my feet and tried to pass my every second.. which seems eternity at home… feeling so heavy at chest.. wanted to cry it out but couldnt.. in the end i travalled around to find peace to pass time faster… since thursday i wasn’t at home… nw sitting next to my cousin brother.. yeah, im in klang nw… didn’t make me feel any better at all… instead more guilts pilling up as i know i hav to rush all my assignments once i get home tonight.. which i dun intend to touch it again but i hav to!!
I feel like im escaping from something.. but i dont know what… so many things filled up my head and heart.. i cant breathe and at night i couldnt sleep soundly.. everything around me is driving me mad… i feel sorry for those people who are so concerned about me and i thank those people who love and care for me so much.. but can i tell them, i cant take it anymore??? I just want to do the things i like to do but i dont know why! It’s so funny and ironic!!!!!!
